The Middle

Disclaimer: I make some generalizations and exaggerations in this post. I don't mean to offend anyone, so please don't take it too personally. ;-)

The Middle has been on my mind a lot lately. I guess the polarized positions in parenting and politics have really stood out to me lately and I'm thinking that in most cases the best place to be is somewhere in the middle. The problem is, the middle is surprisingly hard to find.

Parenting: We've been having a hard time getting David to sleep at night at a decent hour and he rarely goes down for naps. I've read dozens of articles and a few books about infant sleep habits and sleep training techniques. According to the "experts" I can either a) "parent" him to sleep by cuddling, rocking, nursing, etc until he drifts off into a pleasant dreamland, or b) let him put himself to sleep by "crying it out." Both methods have merit and make themselves sound like the only method a rational and loving parent would use. They each disparage the opposing philosophy by telling you that if you choose the other way you will be responsible for society's downfall. The "cuddle" method people say that the "cry it out" parents are heartless and selfish and that "cry it out" kids are going to experience lasting feelings of abandonment and will be plagued with emotional problems well into adulthood. "Cry it out" folks claim that "cuddle" parents are coddling, spineless hippies whose children turn into entitlement seeking addicts with no will power and little intrinsic motivation to be anything but a social parasite.

Oh, well if those are my choices...I choose...a life of guilt and self-doubt, thinking that every mistake my child makes throughout his life is because of how I tried to get him to fall asleep when he was a baby. Yup, that's what I want. That's the best of both worlds, right?

(And don't get me started on breastfeeding vs. formula feeding or birthing or potty training.)


Politics: I'm sure the political polarization was glaringly obvious to most of us during the recent election season. I know we all got sick of not only the advertising, but of all the comments by friends on social media. In my opinion, both sides have their good points and their bad points. According to some of my conservative friends, liberals are lazy, welfare abusing, socialists. Some of my liberal friends think that conservatives are gun-obsessed, bigots with a side of religious zealotry.

Seriously people, no wonder there's no bipartisan law-making going on in this country! We get angry with those officials who try to compromise at all, saying they're not conservative or liberal enough. I'm sorry, but in a country as big as ours there has to be some give and take if there is to be real progress and legislation that will be better for everyone, not just for whoever is in charge. (This is my opinion, feel free to disagree with me, but just know I am not going to change my mind no matter how much sense your arguments make. Wink, wink.)


I guess what I'm trying to say is that finding the "happy medium" is really difficult. It takes a lot of study and trial and error to find what really works best. It also takes patience and perseverance, because sometimes it's just easier to do what the book says. Also it takes a lot of humility, because there are times when we have to swallow our pride and adjust our way of thinking to make room for ideas we didn't come up with on our own.

Thanks for reading, if you got this far. I just wanted to get this out since it's been on my mind so much over the last few weeks. Here's to The Middle and a full night's sleep! Cheers!